i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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