Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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