I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
