I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
