Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
