The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
