Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to put some appletini on your dick
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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