just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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