Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
