sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
