at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize