her vagine was all disorganized.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
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and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
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I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize