her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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