She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
