So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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