Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize