I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Randomize