My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
