Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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