Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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