Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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