in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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