yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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