thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I love having hate sex.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
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Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
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It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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