Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
