you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
