I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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