There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
