Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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