Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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