I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
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