Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
