wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
