I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
