oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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