it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
