Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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