Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize