Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Houston, we have a squirter
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
