I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
