Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize