Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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