Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
