I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
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