This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
So much Jack, so little girl.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
