it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
