I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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