Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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