They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
