It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
My penis needs a shock collar
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
